Alcohol and Me: A Veteran’s Reflection on an Unhealthy Relationship
As Christmas approaches, many of us anticipate the revelry, connection, and shared moments over drinks. For years, I was part of that tradition. As a soldier, alcohol was more than a drink, it was camaraderie, stress relief, and sometimes, a coping mechanism. It was woven into the fabric of my life, socially acceptable and seemingly harmless. But over time, I began to see the cracks in that narrative and the impact alcohol has on me.
I want to make it clear, I’m not an alcoholic. But I do know this, my relationship with alcohol isn’t a healthy one. I lack an “off button,” that ability to stop once I started. Alcohol felt like a release, but it often left me disconnected from myself and others in ways I couldn’t fully appreciate at the time.
The Psychomotor Effect: What Alcohol Does to Us
Alcohol’s effects on the body and mind are well-documented. It slows down the nervous system, impairing judgment, coordination, and reaction time. But it’s the subtler psychomotor effects, the way alcohol disinhibits, numbs emotions and dulls our ability to process stress, that make it so insidious. For soldiers and veterans, who often carry a heavy load of unprocessed experiences, alcohol can feel like a shortcut to relief.
In reality, it’s a trap. While it might ease tension in the moment, alcohol doesn’t address the underlying causes of stress or trauma. Instead, it perpetuates a cycle where emotions are suppressed, only to resurface later, often with more intensity.
A Socially Acceptable Danger
In military culture and society at large, drinking is celebrated. It’s a marker of inclusion, a way to bond, and a socially acceptable escape. For veterans, alcohol can become a bridge between the regimented life of service and the freedom of civilian life. But the very normalisation of drinking makes it harder to recognise when it’s causing harm.
For me, it has taken time to see that my relationship with alcohol wasn’t serving me. I’ve realised that while I don’t depend on it, I also cannot moderate it. It didn’t make me feel stronger or freer. In fact, it often left me feeling less in control of my life, which was ironic given how much control I sought to maintain elsewhere.
Why I’m Not Drinking This Christmas
This year, I’ve made a choice… not to drink during the holiday season. It’s not about controlling everything or being overly strict with myself. It’s about recognising what’s good for me and what’s not. I’ve come to understand that alcohol doesn’t enhance my life; it diminishes it.
Choosing not to drink doesn’t mean opting out of connection or joy. If anything, it allows me to be more present in the moments that matter. I want to experience the holidays fully, without the haze of alcohol or the regret that often follows.
An Invitation to Reflect
I’m sharing this because I know I’m not alone. Many of us have complicated relationships with alcohol, shaped by culture, habit, and unspoken expectations. As Christmas approaches, I invite you to reflect on your relationship with drinking.
Does alcohol add value to your life, or does it take more than it gives?
Are you drinking to connect with others or to escape something within yourself?
What would it look like to approach the holidays with intention and clarity?
There’s no judgment meant here, only an opportunity to ask yourself what you need most this season. For me, it’s about embracing presence, connection, and self-respect.
If you’re curious about exploring your relationship with alcohol or want to understand how to navigate the holiday season in a way that feels healthy and true to you, I’d love to help.
Let’s raise a toast… not to alcohol, but to choosing what truly serves us.